The Coldest Spring

I once was the target of a bully.
But this bully was no schoolyard rival after homework and lunch money,
It was a man after my heart.

It began as warm and delicate as spring.
A blossoming love affair complete with smooth kisses and serenades.
He embraced me so warmly
I removed all the layers I had built.

I was in love.

My love was met wish his lust
Hard, long, powerful thrusts.
I found his passion to be as scorching
As July's sun.
First stealing my heart
Now capturing my trust.
I was mesmerized by such esteem
That I fooled myself into believing he was the man of my dreams.

I ignored the subtle changes
Which accompanied his demeanor
Busy hoping things would get better.
I laughed when he called me a punk,
Jeans too tight to be worn in his family's sight was the first glimpse of my beautiful golden world changing
To dimmer, darker phases.
I cried when he called me a faggot!
The harsh sting of a brittle wind of change distorting my world.
A catalyst of colder events.

A push here, a fist there
Love never felt so cold.
Just be a man! Stop those tears!
Words so harsh they left bruises no hand could ever make.

How did it get so far?

These blossomed lips no longer dripped
Sweet honey kisses but gushed hot blood.
Eyes that once embraced bright sunny skies only sought overcast, dim lit worlds.

Pulling off these clothes and looking at this bruised and bleeding image I wonder, when did this become me?
Taunted by the reflection of a slumbering body peacefully smiling.
How could someone I love make a heaven of my Hell?
Bags packed but nowhere to go I weep
At the realization of my resolve.
I've found my spring
It's just a little cold.